Aging Well

As we age our relationships change.

I suppose that seems obvious, but it comes as a surprise to most of my acquaintances.  I want to begin exploring this reality, and I invite you along in this exploration.  Please leave your comments, your insights, and your disagreements in the comment box.

I had warm relationships with people I worked with.  Then I retired.  Only two of these folks were willing to maintain a friendly contact, and it was all up to me.  That was a somewhat surprising change, but not unexpected.  When I changed jobs as a younger man much the same thing happened.  People with whom I shared life, values,. experiences, successes were suddenly "moving on" and for me not to recognize it was to be horribly out of touch with reality.

Retirement is an adventure I am experiencing along with aging.  I am only semi-retirement, but I serve more retired folks than not-yet-retired folks so I get a feel for the changes.

People move on, as in, move to other parts of town, move to other states, even move to other countries.  It's harder to maintain a relationship with folks you can't have coffee with every week.  In any event, the relationship changes.

I wonder, sometimes, when people no longer return calls inviting them to dinner or coffee or seeing a film together if they were "using" me for some end and my retirement means I have nothing to offer anymore.  Probably I'm paranoid, but relationships change.

It seems harder to make new friends.  People already have their social circles, and often have no room for new folks in those circles.  I don't feel like standing just outside the circle waiting for someone to die or move away. . .

What have been your experiences?  Leave a comment.  I'll continue this next week.